Wednesday, April 25, 2018

You don't have to stay on the stupid board

No, I'm not talking about Jumanji. It's actually more dangerous than that. It's more subtle than that.

My daughter just recently got The Game of Life. It's awesome because our family can play together and my wife and I can be reminded of playing the game when we were our daughter's age. It's fun but incredibly unrealistic.

If you haven't played - or haven't played recently - here's how it works.

You start by picking a car and placing the appropriately colored peg (pink or blue) in the car representing you.

Next, you pick a career path. You have two primary choices: college or workforce. Once you make up your mind on the path, you pick two cards are random and choose the actual job that you'll have for the majority of the game (there is an option to choose a different path later).

Then the fun begins... you start spinning the wheel.

Based on the number you spin (1-10), you move forward that many spaces. If you chose the college career path it takes you longer to pass your first paycheck square, but when you pass those you get to collect on your salary.

You run into random things like spending money on a vacation, buying a house, getting married, having kids, etc. It goes on and on.

The purpose of the game is to get to the end the fastest and with the most money (the first one there collects more money).

As I was playing Life with my kids one night I kept commenting on how unrealistic it was... and then I laid down in bed that night and was terrified by the thought that it's extremely realistic. Most people live their lives EXACTLY like this. Here's what I mean...

We randomly pick whether we are going to college based on completely irrelevant information like whether or not our parents went, how much money we want to make, what our guidance counselor tells us... none of which hold weight in the real world. The only reason you should go to college is that you're passionate about something that you can't learn or be certified without going to college. Your lifelong passion has been to be a doctor (regardless of pay)? Go to college. Your dad is a die-hard Penn State fan? Don't go to college. But we choose randomly.

And I'm not just picking on college. What about those that don't go to college? Are they picking their career based on passion or because they have a relative that can get them a job somewhere? It's silly... and it's random. Just like the game.

Moving on.

We spin the wheel every day. We mindlessly work from paycheck to paycheck.

We get married when everyone says we should get married. "You're 32 and not married? You're running out of time!" It's absurd. Just like the game.

We spend money on things we don't need because everyone else is doing it. Just like the game.

We race to add up more and more wealth so we can "win" in the end. Just like the game.

The reason this terrifies me is that I know how I've lived my life and I see my kids growing up in a world not much different. There are still pressures to do things just for the sake of doing them. Just because you passed that square and the game said you should.

But there has to be a better way.

A life that's not based on pre-determined timelines and societal-driven events... but one based on passion and purpose.

I want my kids to live a life that says, "I will get married when I'm ready."

I want my kids to live a life that says, "I'm going to be a historian because I LOVE it and I'll figure out a way to make a living."

I want my kids to live a life that says, "It's not random and I'm not following the crowd. I'm changing the world."

Because in the end, it's not a game. No one wins and no one loses. We all get to play. And none of us have to stay on the stupid board. Build your own path. Go your own way. Make your own decisions. And in the end, the new path that you create just might be the one that we've needed all along.